Between the housework, the schooling, the errands, the out-of-the-house activities and all the other responsibilities required of a homeschool mom every day, there seems to be little time to squeeze in a few moments of quiet and alone time. Self-care is often touted as a key to homeschooling success – but how can you actually get the time for yourself in the middle of this busy life?
The secret to alone time as a busy homeschool mom is prioritization. You have to intentionally find moments in your day that are set aside just for you to recharge and reset without taking away from the other responsibilities you have. Here are some ideas on how to get alone time as a busy homeschool parent.
Use the little moments.
There are always moments in the day you can sneak in a quick “me time.” Lock yourself in the bathroom for 5 minutes and watch a silly video to make yourself smile. Turn off the radio in the family vehicle when you are off to the grocery store and sit in silence. If there is another adult or older child who can make sure no one is burning the house down while you make a meal, put in some earphones and listen to a podcast for parents or your favourite music (and don’t forget to dance!) Use all these little moments to charge up and breathe.
Before or after.
You know you and your family best. Can you get up an hour before the kids usually do? Can you stay up an extra hour after they go to bed? Is there a way to sneak in some time just for you before or after the day? For some people, this is vital. For others, its impossible depending on the ages and stages of their children.
Have an intentional quiet time every day.
When our kids are very little, they often have designated afternoon naps. That tradition of a quiet period in the day can continue long after children no longer need the extra sleep. This is a perfect time to have quiet activity boxes with fun, independent projects for your kids to take to their rooms for an hour of silence, or for quiet reading time.
Use technology.
You can intentionally set up a time of day where the kids can use technology. Maybe it’s time where they can play a video game, watch a TV show, read on a Kindle, or spend time on a computer. Set a timer and let them enjoy themselves. You now have a set period of time to do whatever you need to do to recharge as well.
Set boundaries.
Teach your kids that you need time to yourself sometimes. This modeling of boundaries and how to apply them is a terrific life skill for them to learn! Set a timer (kids love visual reminders to help them succeed), give them something to do, and ask them to let you have some space so that you can charge back up and be the best homeschool parent you can be! Of course, it might not be possible to have more than a few minutes if your kids are little, but that can expand over time.
Kid-Swap.
If you have another homeschooling family nearby, you might be able to work out a plan to kid swap once in a while. One week, your kids go to their house and the next, they come to yours (or whatever scenario will work best for you both). This can give you a larger chunk of time to yourself and give your kids some much needed friend time.
Hire a Mother’s Helper.
Similar to a babysitter, you can hire someone to come into the house and spend focused time on your kids while you are still physically there. That means that if there’s an emergency, you are available, but you know the kids are being taken care of while you spend time doing something for yourself. The kids love having someone special to do things with and you get alone time. Win-win. Some suggestions are to look for a homeschooled teen, check the local community college for students studying ECE, or ask a retired neighbour.
Activities & Clubs.
There are lots of extracurricular activities that your children can get involved in – from art lessons to community clubs to sports to church groups to library classes. As long as you take care not to overstuff your calendar and burn out your child with too many things, these can give you a period of time to yourself. Some may require you to stay in the building – so bring a book or something just for yourself then sit in the corner. Others might expect you to leave – head to a coffee shop or the library or a park. Use the alone time to refill yourself.
Take a class.
Sometimes, we need to do something that feels kind of selfish in order to refuel ourselves. Find a local or online class on something you’ve always wanted to learn and do it! Want to be creative? Take a photography class or try pottery. Look for a community writers’ club. Want to get healthy? Search for a fitness class or a walking group. Want to better your life skills? Check if the local hardware store is running DIY training classes. Take a class at the community college nearby. Find something for you to do alone.
Go outside.
Whether it’s heading to a local park or playground, letting the kids ride their bikes up and down the sidewalk in front of your house, or just being out in the backyard, giving your kids time to play outside often keeps them busy and out of your space for a while. Especially if there is a friend that can join them. I’ve spent many an outside time in a chair on the porch or on the grass supervising with my feet up and a good book. Take the kids to the playground and sit on the bench to supervise – unless they are really little, your kids probably don’t need you to hover like a helicopter. Give them space and give you a few moments to just breathe.
Prioritization means that you intentionally put something first – and I know as moms (especially homeschool moms) we have a bad habit of putting ourselves last. We are so focused on making sure the kids are happy and healthy, school is done, meals are made, and the house looks presentable, that we often forget to give ourselves time throughout the day. Be intentional about finding some alone time – because burnout is a lot harder than finding five minutes here or there to recharge.
Wondering what to do in these alone moments? Here are some self-care ideas for all kinds of time frames – from 5 minutes to getting away.
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